IF KIDS ARE OUR FUTURE, WHERE THE HELL ARE THE KEYS TO MY DELOREAN!?
Ok thats harsh...I actually LOVE kids, I have four! Two boys and two girls. But life ain't always a box of chocolates with them is it?We, meaning myself, my fiance Rich and our children Matt, Jordan, Roxanna and little Charlie (She is in the picture here, just waiting to be born!) we live quite far from all of our family, so we of course do have our struggling moments. But we overcome most with out P.M.A! Yep, from bullying, to burnt dinners to bad cases of the norovirus, Positive mental attitude is what keeps this family ticking along!
Life is hard for everyone at the moment, what with Job cuts, the governments brutality against the average family and simply life itself becoming harsher and less patient, hopefully with my blog you will see you don't need a massive bank-balance to be happy, nor to be Miss World to feel beautiful. Just P.M.A, cuddles, and chocolate! Its the secret of life don't ya know!
I have been a single mum, for seven years it was just me and my boys, until Richy came along. We are due to get married in June. I am going to use this blog to sound off, to sound out, and to promote the things we cannot live without, and the little things that make us happy!
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| Small mouthed Frog!!! |
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| Wide mouthed Frog!!!! |
No, not the shop! Although you would be forgiven for thinking that!
My daughter Charlie has recently been diagnosed with B.H.S which stands for Breath Holding Spells.
Now that doesn't sound too bad, holding their breath, so what? But anyone who knows a child with this may tell you different.
Firstly, what makes me angry the most is having to justify my daughters actions. Yes, she gets into a massive paddy, yes she then holds her breath until she turns white and then collapses.And yes, sometimes this leads to her having a fit...so what do you do???
We first saw this happen when our 22 month old daughter began to toddle aged about 12 months old. From being a very calm chilled out baby who slept through the night, almost overnight she became Scary Charlie!
You only had to tell her No in the quietest of voices, and it could set her off. She would start crying so loudly ( not too unlike the sound of the old Air-Raid sirens!) and then it would either tail off, or the sound of her next cry would never come, and instead you would see her standing there, her mouth open, eyes scared, until she would topple forwards and collapse, falling unconscious for a few moments. Absolutely terrifying.
We learnt quickly that if she was getting into a paddy, be it through being told No or hurting herself, that we had to intercept her. At first we weren't always quick enough. Her newest thing was to climb up onto the sofa in an absolute paddy and simply let herself fall to the floor like some kind of suicidal bid of attention. But I know deep down this isn't her choice to be like this, the fear in her eyes after an episode shows me as a mother that my little girl doesn't want to do this, she has no choice.
The worst time was a few weeks ago when I shut the back door. Yep, All I did was shut the door so she could no longer go outside. She screamed, then ran across the room, she was crying, but as always, suddenly the sound never came, her lips turned purple and before I could reach her, she had toppled forward, landing on her face. I picked her up, her breathing had stopped so I blew strongly into her face, this can sometimes shock them into taking a breath. Others rely on water, but I find by the time I've gotten to the taps she's over the worst!
Well, this time the blowing in the face didn't do anything, nor did me shouting her name. Charlies eyes were in the back of her head and her body was jerking as if in a seizure so I knew I had to get her into the recovery position in case she swallowed her tongue or hurt herself more. This is difficult as your first reaction is to scream and shake them awake, and cuddle them close.
Petrified I asked my 13 yr old son, Matt, to remove my four year old daughter Roxanna who by this point was crying seeing her sister in such distress. I had forgotten about her in all the worry. Charlie then started to cry normally, it had all taken under a minute, but in my heart it may as well have been hours.
There are some key things required when your child has a fit. Its easy to learn them, but oh so difficult to remember them when you're panicking, so maybe get a list and have it printed out and put it on your fridge or in your bag, this way if there is ( touch wood there isn't!) an emergency, you can focus on something.
Firstly do ensure a visit to your doctor to rule out any anaemia as anaemic children will suffer from BHS more than others. Also your doctor can rule out any other causes.
The main points are to keep calm, if your child does suffer from BHS try to avoid the situations that set him/her off! ( Easier said than done!) If they do start crying and you are worried then hold your child without giving too much attention until he/she calms down, then when they seem calmer just let them carry on as normal. I find now if I have to say "no" to Charlie, I do so by getting down to her level and holding tightly onto her hands ( not so tight it hurts!) but firmly enough to hold her in case my discipline sets her off!
Lastly, don't worry. Kids are resilient little things! After an episode she soon forgets what happened and can carry on as normal. They do grow out of these episodes I'm told, usually by the age of six. Fear or pain can set them off, so you can't ever stop them from happening no matter how careful you are. Just know that if your child does suffer, forget any stares or mumblings that your child is just 'Having a tantrum!' Ignore! Your baby cannot help this, so enjoy knowing your child is special as the more positively you deal with this, the easier it will get!
Do let me know any tips or experiences you have had with BHS, as Its always nice to hear of others dealing with it, stops you feeling so alone! xxx Lotsa love, Carrie!
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